A Little Whining, A Little Introspection

CAUTION: WHININESS AHEAD.

Hmmm… in my last post did I say I wasn’t going to be running for a while?  I am so bad at that.  Saturday night as I was checking to see what time spin class was the next morning, I just didn’t want to do it.  The thought of another morning in the gym was like torture to me.  The forecast for Sunday morning was perfect running weather, cool and sunny.  So I decided to take it to the trail instead.  I did 6.5 super slow miles.  I wore my Garmin just so I could tell how far I’d gone but I didn’t pay any attention to it.  I’m pretty sure that yesterday’s run might be a new PR for slowest run of my life.  I walked when I needed to.  I stopped to take pictures.  I soaked up the gorgeous weather and the beautiful spring scenery.

bridgewater

It was completely frustrating and wonderful at the same time.  There were some tears shed.  I have the amazing talent of being able to cry and run at the same time.  Lucky for me because it happens on a fairly regular basis.  I’m a crier.

The run was actually pretty good.  Minimal ankle pain, minimal hip pain, lots of icing and foam rolling when I got home.  I feel like progress is being made.  I also feel like trail running is good for me right now.  Staying off the cement and on surfaces that are a lot more forgiving is probably a good idea.  And what was encouraging was how good everything felt the rest of the day.  I was afraid I would be limping and in pain but it felt great.  On the other hand, it still feels far from normal.  I wonder if it will ever feel normal again.  Dreams of the 50 miler are quickly fading.  Not only do I not think a 50 miler is in my near future, I’m starting to think that fall marathons are not going to happen for me either.  But for now, I’m going to try to push those thoughts out of my head.  The fall is still a long way off.  I have time.  Deep breath.

struggle

(source)

 Life has been a bit of a struggle lately.  Possibly related to my lack of running?  Definitely a possibility.  Running is my stress reliever/coping mechanism.  Without it everything feels just a little harder.  But for some reason, this rainy spring morning just feels right.  Some days these cloudy wet mornings feel dreary and depressing, but not today.  The rain is washing away the old and watering the new.  The trees that were leafless and bare only a month ago are now covered in bright green.  Things that felt impossible last night, feel small this morning.  The heaviness I’ve been feeling lately was washed away with the rain.

And I’m left feeling thankful.  The list of things I have to be thankful for is long.  This morning I’m particularly thankful for my sister, my rock.  Last night, as I was whining to her about life for approximately the 4 millionth time, I apologized for being such a broken record.  Her response?  “When you play a record (or a song) over and over, it’s because you love it!”  She knows me like no one else and loves me anyway.  That is an amazing thing!  Not to mention she always knows the right thing to say.  She is one smart cookie.  Love you Alice!

sisters

This morning I’m excited to head back to spin class.  And then to see another doctor about this ankle of mine.  And I’ll leave you with one of my favorite quotes.

storms

Happy Monday!

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